Regulating Relationship Risk: Partner Responsiveness as a Safety Signal

People are fundamentally motivated to be included in safe relationships - relationships where they are consistently cared for and protected. Building on the risk-regulation model, this article describes five cues (i.e., affectionate touch, gratitude, acceptance, investments, power) that romantic partners can use to gauge their value to one another, and thus, how safe they are trusting one another to be responsive in specific situations. It also describes how feeling more versus less safe in response to these cues contingently motivates partners to increase connection versus protect themselves against being hurt. The article concludes by describing how people who are chronically less trusting misread these cues, a pessimistic bias that results in them protecting themselves against being hurt unnecessarily, compromising connection.