Previously endured distress reduces the quality of the compassion extended toward sufferers of workplace distress

Summary In difficult times, how can we alleviate employees' distress? Lay beliefs suggest that high‐quality compassionate responses come from those who have “been there” before. According to hot–cold empathy gap theory, however, firsthand experience with another's distress may activate distorted memories of past distress, leading people to underestimate the severity and difficulty of another's current distress. Grounded in a relational perspective of compassion, we examine how sufferers experience the quality of actions taken to alleviate their distress (i.e., compassion action quality; CAQ), along with the responders' perceptions of their own responses (i.e., self‐efficacy). Across three studies, we find that sufferers experience lower CAQ from responders who have (vs. have not) previously endured a similar distress. We examine three mechanisms that explain the negative effect of previously endured distress on CAQ, based on responders' self‐focus, validation of sufferer's distress, and self‐efficacy. We also examine the boundary conditions of this effect and find that it is distress specific. Specifically, this effect does not hold when responders who previously endured distress respond to sufferers who are currently enduring a different type of distress. These findings advance organizational research on compassion and inform efforts to improve people's capacity to alleviate distress at work.